What REALLY Makes You Healthy (Hint: it's not healthy food).

*I had a change in what I wrote on the percent of women who get breast cancer.  Thought I should point it out, because I was just remembering a number off the top of my head, but I should double check my facts before I write them down, I guess. Anyway, it's updated in here.

Camille eating an apple.
An apple a day, however, does not necessarily keep the doctor away.

I think a few of you follow Greensmoothiegirl.  Did you read her posts about how she "Accidentally walked for the cure?"  She went jogging in NY and happened upon a bunch of pink-wearing supporters.  She talks about the marketing genius of the campaign (did you know greensmoothiegirl actually teaches marketing - or something in the business department - at BYU?).  Anyway, her insight is interesting, and worth your read, I think.  But I don't totally agree.

For a while now, the "Walk for the Cure" has made me unsettled inside.  My mom had breast cancer about 4 years ago.  My mother-in-law had it this past year.  It's not that I didn't want treatment for them, but it drives me absolutely nuts how breast cancer is on a very steep climb, and yet, we're so worried about the "cure" and no one does anything to figure out the cause.  I mean, what if 12% of women didn't have to have their breasts chopped off in the first place?  In addition, my MIL is now on a medication she is supposed to take for the rest of her life, and it is making her absolutely ill.  She has become a different person this past year, since her treatments began.  Because of "early diagnosis" she had no clue of her disease until her yearly mammogram   She's been though so much.  She was so full of energy, came to visit all the time, just generally happy.  She is really struggling now to feel good, be happy, and have energy.  And yet she's getting top of the line care from the nearby cancer treatment center that is world-renowned.

That said, I'm not sure that alternative treatments have all that much more to offer.  I have told many of you how I got interested in alternative medicine in the first place.  Dana had a urinary tract infection.  We took her to the ER on doctors orders.  The bill came out to be $5600.  This was a non-complicated UTI, but the bill was as much as it costs to have a baby!  Anyway, I decided then I wanted OUT of the system of our health care.  I am so frugal in every way, and yet it was always those medical bills that we were throwing huge chunks of money at.  I have not even spent $5600 to clothe my ENTIRE family for our ENTIRE marriage, and yet, all that for one UTI.  (PS. We had insurance and got a lawyer involved, so our insurance paid up except $1500.  But still).  In addition to that, I felt completely HELPLESS watching Dana be so sick.  She was only 4 months old at the time, and there wasn't a thing I could do for her.  Because I think about emergency preparedness a lot, I realized w/o antibiotics she would have died.  So all this led me on my natural quest, which has been an interesting journey.

We have seen several natural practitioners for this and that.  In western medicine, there is a standard of care that is predictable.  If my kid has a fever for more than a few days, I know what to expect:  check the ears, the throat, the lungs.  If nothing, either wait, or check the urine. And then, of course, out come the antibiotics.  Pretty simple.  But these natural doctors are all over the place.  One will do foot-zoning, one will recommend homeopathics, one spine adjustments, etc. etc.  In fact, I have been to several chiropractors, and they are all so different from each other.  But the thing that bugs me most about them, is they are all SURE they can fix the problem.  See, a regular doctor will send you elsewhere if they don't know what to do for you.  Not these natural guys (except one lady I saw).  You may have to go in 10 or 20 times, but don't worry, they have the solution!  Hardly. I started becoming pretty suspicious when I looked at the people around me in the chiropractic office, and realized they were really not any healthier-looking than the general population at Walmart.  And I could say the same for the natural practitioners themselves.

So what are we to do?  Breast cancer (and every cancer and disease for that matter) is on the rapid rise.  Is eating a raw vegan diet (or a Weston Price diet, or a whole foods diet, or whatever) going to prevent cancer?  No, as you'll see if you read greensmoothiegirl's comments.  It definitely helps people be healthier than they otherwise would be, so may prevent some cancer.  But ultimately your food does not make you healthy.

Did I just say that?  I think I'll say it again, because I'm sure you are all dying of shock that I, of all people, just said that.  FOOD DOES NOT MAKE YOU HEALTHY.  Maybe a little healthier than you otherwise would be.  But I'll tell you, we eat pretty darn perfect (and have also been all over the map mostly vegan, Weston Price, whole foods, etc.), and my kids have more digestive problems than a lot of kids who walk around drinking sodas and eating chips all the time.  So what makes you healthy, I believe, is your body.  But it's not your genes.  You see, if it were GENETIC, these diseases would not be on the rise, because there is no such thing as a genetic epidemic.  I believe it's your body, but NOT your genes.  It's the bacteria in your body.  If your bacteria is healthy enough to eliminate toxins from your body, you are healthy, even if you eat toxic food (i.e. junk food).  If your body does not have enough good bacteria, then those toxins stay inside you.  Eating healthy foods will bind to some of those toxins and help them to not damage you so much.  And a healthy diet will help you not add too many new toxins to your body.  But healthy food, even juicing, does not eliminate those toxins.  It is crucial to have that good bacteria.  I learned about this almost 2 years ago, and have been on a quest to find the best way to replace that good bacteria (Nice try, Yoplait, but you aren't anywhere near strong enough to make someone healthy).  What I am finding is that this gut health idea is not new, and there are many possible solutions to the problem.  I'm finally making good progress (I took a terrible down-turn for a while), but I'm doing better.  I have a ways to go, still.

So back to what greensmoothiegirl said.  I, personally, am cutting western medicine some slack.  It really is much more complicated than drinking greensmoothies. Our bodies are so very complicated.  Not that there isn't a way to be healthy, but that the solution is not simple.  I am glad I have come to these terms, because when I first entered the natural world, I became pretty bitter against western medicine.  Besides the fact that they ripped me off financially over and over, I was mad that the stuff I'd been giving my kids to make them healthy was in fact, treating symptoms and ultimately made them more unhealthy.  I was mad that they make all natural people seem like quacks.  They have a total monopoly on the market.  Who, after all, wants to fall for quackery?  But really, a lot of the natural treatments I have seen are in no way "healing" us any more than the drugs were.  They are also treating symptoms, they are just doing so naturally.  So we're on a quest to fill our guts/bowels with good bacteria.  It's exciting, expensive, and I hope and pray that in a year or so I can tell you all about our successful journey *please oh please.*  That's what I think.

(Halloween at end of post)

I got a card in the mail today.  This is what it said:

Dear [us],

I just had to write a brief note to tell you what a superb job your little son did on Sunday [primary program].  I was so impressed at how well he sang.  He knew all the songs, practically word-for-word of every verse, and performed as well as his dear little voice would allow.

In this day and age children's attention spans are limited but he is to be congratulated for paying attention and picking up what he has learned.  I have worked in Primary as a Chorister and know how difficult it can be to teach songs to children.  He must be one of the exceptions to the rule.

I so much enjoyed sitting in the front row listening to him sing.  He really put his heart and soul into every song, it was a joy to watch and listen.

Thank you for raising such a precious, stalwart young child.  You have every reason to be justly proud of him.  If he's like this at Sunbeam age, think of the possibilities as he grows into adolescence and young manhood.  It will be a pleasure to watch him develop.

Thank him for bringing such a beautiful ray of sunshine into my life on Sunday.  I could hug him to pieces.

Love, [Lady who I didn't know by name, who I have hardly talked to]



This note is one I am keeping.

Well, Levi does makes me super proud.  I've been trying to upload videos of his piano playing but blogger isn't letting me.  But he's making crazy progress.  I found it interesting she mentioned his attention span because it's so true.  He is so out of this world with his focus. He catches onto things and remembers everything, I tell you.  Oh, except he doesn't remember to go to the bathroom.

BUUUUUUT, this lady!  What a sweet woman.  I don't know if she wrote notes like this to everyone (she's not even in the primary, and I didn't know she knew who Levi was), but either way, what a thoughtful thing to do.  I feel like I am always in my own little world.  I have so much to do.  I try to be nice, but I don't notice things, and I don't remember to congratulate people.  It sounds so bad, but I really truly have horrible brain fog.  I used to think it was me being blonde, but after being in the world of natural health, I completely believe in the term "brain fog."  I think being thoughtful like this should be my end goal in life.  I want to send nice sincere notes to people to make their day (or their month, like this one).  What a sweetheart.  I definitely know who she is now.  And she's my hero.

And because I don't want to leave this blog w/o a picture, here's Halloween:

Levi wanted to be something scary.  I was relieved when he thought a Ninja was scary.  As far as Dana, well,  I want my kids to be what they WANT to be, but I am selfish when I say I don't want my girls to be only fairies and princesses for the next 10 years.  So I was so happy when Dana liked this little get-up, probably because of the lacy underskirt.

This year was store-bought, mostly from the consignment shop.  So for $24 and very little effort, 3 kids were happy.

Tomatoes

Using butter knives.

My MIL is the best.  She really is.

One thing she does is gardens for us, harvests it for us, and delivers it to our door. Sometimes she even helps me preserve it.  This is our first year w/ a back yard, and the first thing Jason did after moving in was build a little garden box in the back yard.  But it went in late, and it's small, so certainly not enough to preserve.  Anyway, so in-laws have been our garden source for years, which we truly appreciate.

So I came to the conclusion a while ago I don't bottle food to save money.  What do I save, maybe $2/hr?  But I think it's a good thing to do.  The kids are getting old enough to be semi-helpful, which is nice.  Okay, it's really hard to hold down the fort around here and preserve food at the same time. But Levi and Dana do help some.

Funny story:  I remember when I was first in college I was so surprised to see my roommates use bottled spaghetti sauce from the store.  I didn't even know it existed!  My mom always used tomato sauce and a seasoning packet.  Fast forward a couple years, after I was married my MIL told me I could make spaghetti by using a can of diced tomatoes and spices.  What?  I had no idea.  I remember having a surplus of garden tomatoes one fall a few years back, and I opened a can of tomatoes to make "homemade" spaghetti sauce.  Ha ha.  Shortly thereafter, I realized I could use fresh tomatoes to make it.  I just thought back to this today and laughed at myself.  DUUUHHH!!!  Needing packets, bottles, cans (eye roll).  That's completely opposite how I cook now.

A call to parents to not give in!

Okay, Moms, let's talk.  We have a problem.  Our children are turning into ZOMBIES!!!!

It's a horror movie come to life.

I've recently mentioned my dislike for technological addictions, but I am just thinking, perhaps us moms could do something about it.

I went to my SIL's babyshower today.  I was talking to a relative who just pulled her children out of a charter school to homeschool for two reasons, one of them being that her third grader came home every day and cried and begged for a phone because all her friends had one.  She is nine!!!!  Um, there is a problem here.  

Later at the shower my niece said that being in the Beehive Presidency makes her feel like she needs a cell phone because she is expected to "text her girls" to let them know about the activities.  She is the best girl ever, super mature for her age, and super reluctant to grow out of childhood, which she relishes.  She talked about how it is stupid that everyone texts all the time, but it's annoying to have to borrow her mom's phone to text her girls.  (She's one of the only youth I know who recognizes this, ha ha).

Okay, so it's definitely not just a problem at the schools.

But is this really a problem?  I am definitely not the only one to think this.  I was thinking of linking to some studies and articles, but there are just too many.  It's all over the web.  Here's one, just the first one I found today, but it does its job in explaining the problem.  It's alarming to a lot of people, and no one seems to know what to do.  Well, teach our kids how to use technology safely (not while driving, not putting to much info on the web, etc.).  That should help, right?  Maybe.

The point is they are ADDICTED.  It's not just a habit.  If you wonder if you are addicted to technology, when you get an urge to do whatever it is you do (text, get on the computer, smart phone etc.), check your feelings.  Do you feel unsettled inside.  Is the technology your release from that feeling?  Then after you use your tech stuff, how do you feel during?  Do you feel more calm?  Could you go for a week (or a day) without it?  How would you feel if you went for that time without it?  Our RS Pres has a rule in her family no techy stuff on Sundays.  She said it is painfully hard for her children.

Children and adolescents that have so much life ahead of them should not have to rely on anything to feel normal.  Do they feel anxious if they don't brush their teeth for a day?  That is a habit.  Their mouths would feel gross, but likely they would feel emotionally just fine.  Not so with their smart phones.  

But it's the way the world is going.  We would be outcasts to not follow these trends, to expect things to be different!  We couldn't function in society!  To that I say, who the heck cares?  If you saw people lining up for a shot that turned them into zombies, would you feel like you needed to put your kids in line so they would fit in?  Of course not.  You would run! 

So, you might ask, what's the damage?  They still go to family parties.  Who cares if they are texting while there?  They can still go hiking, even, and text on the way.  What's the big deal?  The big deal is if they are addicted, their agency is being constricted.  They are dependent on something else for happiness.  They CAN'T NOT do it.  What's NOT the problem with this?  Sure, texting causes some car accidents, kids have a problem with face to face interaction these days, missionaries go out and have a problem giving this up can't cut it in the field, Young employees are zoning out at work with virtual socializing, etc.  But most importantly, they need something to make them happy, which is artificial, and should not be happening.

My nephew mentioned that the seminary teachers talk about this quite a bit.  "You shouldn't be using your devices so much.  You shouldn't be playing games so much. On your missions you will use these devices to organize your schedule, and if you are used to spending so much wasted time on them, it will be hard for you."  Thank you, seminary teachers.  I appreciate the gesture.  Nevertheless, this is an addiction, and telling someone to do their addiction less doesn't really work that well.  They may want to, they may even see a need to, but they CAN'T.  Their agency is damaged.  

I understand not everyone sees a problem with virtual zombie-ism.  Fine, whatever.  But I know many people who do.  And their kids come home from school and beg for a phone (and at a young age, I might add), and after a while they give in.  If you can't beat 'em, join 'em, right?  I'm sure you've heard the argument from a parent who dislikes video games that they buy them because otherwise their kids would go to their friends houses to play.  Well what if us parents banned together and decided that individually and collectively we would do what we believe is best for our children, instead of giving into this crazy social pressure?  If as many parents did this who believed it, the kids would not feel like they were the only one without.  Because they wouldn't be.

I don't plan on helping my kids keep phone-free forever, but I firmly believe maturity is a key factor in this issue.

I still have some time before this issue is really affecting my children.  And I plan to get creative.  If I could give my kids the gift of being free from addiction as they enter adulthood, they would be the luckiest children around.  

Levi, Dana and Camille were fingerpainting.

Levi: Camille, that's pretty!
Levi quietly to Dana:  Actually, it's not but we just want her to feel good.

I'm a mom of a school kid

So Levi started school.

I don't even know what to say about this. It's really weird.  But, ya know, I think that by having the mentality of "this may be our only year of sending him to school, and if we do send him later on, it'll be because we choose to and think it will be best for him and our family," has made it a lot easier on me.  Prior I always felt like it was the government ripping our children out of our hands at much too young ages.  So this change of thought has made the transition much easier on me.  Also, two years years ago, I had a wrestle (in prayer, of course) with the Lord about Levi growing up.  I told the Lord I would let it happen (like I had any choice), but He'd have to make me okay with it.  You know, it really helped - a lot.  Also, since I taught him to read and started him in piano, it has been so fun to watch him learn, and has made me more anxious to see him grow and develop, rather than basking in his baby-ness.  All of these things have helped me be okay with his first day of Kindergarten.  I didn't even cry ... or worry.

This is the "casual day" uniform.  The "dress day" requires button up shirts and ties.  So darling. And no, he doesn't mind the tie at all.

Each time I get on to type, I think, "I want to talk more about homeschooling."  I do actually have more reasons than those I've listed.  But I write these posts pretty fast, and I'm not thinking of all my reasons at the time.  Then as I go through my day I'll remember others.  

BUT I'm not going to talk about homeschooling. :) I thought I should tell you why we decided to do the charter school.  

1.  Fear.  Yes, it's true.  I was afraid of giving up our spot in the charter lottery when I didn't really know what we should do.  So if anyone thinks I shouldn't homeschool out of fear, perhaps I also shouldn't send him to school out of fear?  Ha ha.  But anyway, in all honesty, this did play a role.  

2.  I'm up to my eyebrows in responsibility.  This is a challenging time for me, mostly trying to solidify everything with our health.  It has taken a big tole on me (and our budget), and ya know, one more year to get things all worked out (w/o having to worry about school) would do me some good.

3.  I wanted to see what the charter school was like.  It's not very fair to base my decision on his educational opportunities over at the charter school based on nation-wide stats of public schools.  Or even my experience in public school.  This is a fabulous charter school.  Sometimes when I see info about public schools they are talking about inner-city, low-income, etc. etc.  Not the best comparison, even to a nice district like I live in.  But the charter goes beyond the nice district, I think, and I wanted to really see what it would be like. Yeah, he's still in a big classroom w/o individualized instruction (though they do a lot of leveled breakout groups).  But I just wanted to test it out to really see.

Those are the 3 main reasons.  I know I didn't type as much about them as the homeschool stuff.  Funny why that is.  But anyway, the charter seems pretty good, so far.  At least he's having fun if nothing else, ha ha.  Oh, he did say he wants to be an astronaut, now, after learning about the moon today.  I'm sure that will happen.

School

I'm pretty sure we will be sending Levi to the charter school this year.  It is a bitter sweet realization.  But if my concerns are really just as I've said them, I shouldn't have much concern with the charter this next year.  It is only Kindergarten, so the time length is great.  I'm sure I will be going through this process all over again next year, though, because doubling the time demands will be really annoying to me, I think.  But anyway, I think this will give us a chance to see how we like the charter in general.  If it really is outstanding, then perhaps it is worth the time.  There is also a private school not too far that is a half day.  It is also only $120/month.  This may be a good option for us in the future if we decide, if we move a bit closer, and if/when we can actually afford the (small) amount of $120/month.

But I think I will forever more have a love for homeschooling, even if I never do it.  I think I should clarify I had no intention of sitting at home all day with my kids and cutting out leather to make shoes.  I chuckled to myself when I wrote that in the last post, as I was just demonstrating that there are a lot of valuable skills not to be had in schools.  But really, it probably came across as pretty weird.  I am actually very concerned about academics.  There are a lot of homeschooling parents, especially locally, who believe in delayed academics.  While there are possibly some good things about it, in general, I think it merely makes the kids fall behind, which then gives homeschooling a bad name.

There is a blog I read and this mom has such an amazing homeschool.  Her children are a few years older than mine.  They are playing the piano (and getting good, I might add, since there is playing the piano, and playing the piano).  They are soaring with academics.  The 9 year old daughter goes to sewing once a week.  She also picked up the flute the last couple years.  She hires a tutor to come teach her kids Spanish. She is able to make scripture study a part of school. And she has her girls in competitive gymnastics.  They go for 3 hours 2-3x a week.  Here is what she wrote on her blog about gymnastics:

People are always curious as to my reasons for homeschooling the children.  The reasons are myriad but include my desire for the children to be excellent and not overwhelmed.  I want them to excel and develop talents. ...


Gymnastics adds a wonderful balance to our homeschooling.  It gives the girls large blocks of time which they spend with a peer group and other adults.  It is a situation which requires discipline and performance.  Brent and I have no desire to train them for a future in gymnastics, most likely by the time they are 12 we will have reaped all the benefits of the sport.  The rigorous time demands can be very difficult for teammates who spend 7 hours at school.  It is a drain on the child and the family.  This has become very clear from my conversations with the mothers of their peers.  For now, gymnastics is serving an excellent purpose in the health and well being of the girls. 


Isn't that great? I just love that.  You see, homeschooling isn't about keeping your kids at home all the time and missing out in society.  You just get a different taste of society, still great interactions.  Since today is the Olympic Opening Ceremony, I've been thinking about this.  I don't ever plan on raising an Olympic athlete (that's called putting your eggs in the rarest basket), but I did gymnastics as a kid, and I really loved it.  I've always regretted quitting.  You want to know why I quit?  Because I was tired.  It was exhausting to go to school, then go straight to gymnastics, and never feel like you have any free time.  And if you do want to learn an instrument on top of that, or anything else useful... And what about family time, anyway?  You see.  So here I am again talking about homeschooling, when it's not what we will be doing this year.  I'm just trying to show you what I feel like I will be leaving behind if I don't homeschool, and why it makes me a little sad.  But I do have to say there is no one perfect way.  Each of the educational choices we've considered have their pros and cons.

In college I attended a presentation and the speaker was the mother of the year a while back.  She said that the education of your children is your responsibility.  You can use the schools as a tool, if you choose, but ultimately you are in charge of their education.  She also said that in any given year she'd have some children in public, some in private, and some homeschooled, depending on the child and the year (she had 11 children).  I've kind of kept this as my motto ever since, and will probably always consider the individuality of my children for the education.  I don't know if I could do that much juggling with 11 kids, though :)